How to help someone with ADD/ADHD

First I would like to say, to keep reading. Because I think you will find it quite interesting, how I became aware of what exactly this is. And to know for sure if this is what your are dealing with. NOTE: I am not an expert. But I have experienced ADD/ADHD first hand. I myself was diagnosed ADD when I turned 27 and my brother when he was 6 years old, 30 years ago.

First and foremost, you have wonderful talented children just waiting to shine. They know they have something special to share and no I'm not talking special as in special ed children, ( though they to have a special place in this world we call home.) Back to the children knowing they have something special to share with the world but don't have a clue how to express it.

ADD: Attention deficit disorder

ADHD: Attention deficit hyperactive disorder

Growing up I remember myself us a leader, not a follower. But on the other hand, my brother was a follower and not a leader. I took the intuitive, he took the easy way ( which I might add, there is nothing wrong with that) that was who he was, and still is today. I could sit for hours (if you let me) and talk with others, ask questions, daydream, play on my own (which is disturbing to me today that parents fear that there is something wrong with there children because they enjoy hanging out with themselves) ( I know, this because I was one of those parents afraid that my children would not have any friends) Was this do to my childhood? Of enjoying hanging out with myself or was it do to my parents lack of understanding, that I was really o.k. the way I was. So they pushed, and probed me to get out and meet people. What they didn't know was, I was already a natural people person. I enjoyed talking to everyone I met. I just didn't need to go find it. When it happened, then everything flowed naturally. On the other hand my brother ADHD, He was aggressive in fact, that he went in search of friends. He wasn't waiting for know one to come to him, he went looking for them and many friends did he meet, all jocks I might add. And he was also impulsive, doing things for a dare easily. So much so that as he got older he made money doing some weird things out of being dared. Which I believe if his energies were harnessed properly he would never have done some of the things he did. Us parents make to much out of nothing when it comes to our children sometimes. I know I did and so did my mother. I do remember my dad saying "leave them kids alone, quit bothering them". And my mom saying to my dad "you don't know what you are talking about, let me handle this".

Was it a battle of wits or was it my moms genuine concern for us? I do believe both parents were concerned. Each in their own way. My dad not knowing how to express himself to the fullest and my mom just worrying, for the future of her children.

 So, were was I? All that's right, us parents making to much out of nothing when it comes to our children. We could really learn so much if we began to take their cue and not the other way around. We think we know it all. We think we know what the children need, at any given moment. Stop here for a moment, And just ask yourself this question. Does anyone know what I am thinking? I doubt it. So why do we assume we know what our children are thinking. I hope that even if your children aren't diagnosed with this disorder and your reading this hub, that you will begin to let your children think for themselves. And don't beat yourself up, because you haven't let them think for themselves. It's o.k. We children love our parents, even when we don't think we do. But we do I promise.

So now what is ADD/ADHD?

I believe that ADD is a child who's mind runs similar to someone who has drank 10 cups of coffee. And it affects her creative thinking side of the mind, in that she sits, and stares (sometimes at nothing), she daydreams, shes creative, (maybe she likes to color, or draw.) (Make houses out of cardboard boxes or just enjoys going through the junk draw at home looking at curious things she fines.) She has a need also, she just wants to be left to herself to figure things out for herself. She knows how to make friends and enjoys everyone, but it is when she is ready to make them that counts. If her creative energy and thinking energy is put to good use the sky is the limit.

I believe that ADHD is a child who's body runs similar to someone who drank 10 cups of coffee. And it affects her logical thinking side of the mind, in that she is full of physical energy, she is is talkative, and outgoing, enjoys getting out and about to play with the other kids like right this very moment, is usually in to sports, and has a need to burn up energy. If her physical, and logical energy is put to good use the sky is the limit.

Please don't always listen to what the experts say, stop worrying so much about your children, let them be who they were created to be, and one day you will look back and smile.Because your children, will one day thank you for letting them go, to be free and to make the mistakes needed to grow. One day you might just find, that they turned in to a great oak tree, because of the seeds you planted.

One final note: I used she at the end here but it is a fact that both girls and boys are diagnosed with both of these illness, (which in my own opionon I don't believe is an illness)some with both, others with only one or the other. We parents, only hinder our children that are diagnosed with this illness, but adding more pressure to the tiny, little yet wonderful, brilliant minds of our children. I hope this article has encouraged you, to dig deeper in to what is called ADD/ADHD, and see what you unearth, from just your children alone or other articles out there. Remember I am not an expert, I'm just like you, so don't just go by what I say, you could be dealing with something else altogether different. And talk this over with your doctor.  Sincerely Dee